My sister always said you needed a sense of humor as a parent. I see that.

Tonight:

1. Mommy! Come look! I pooped on your bathroom floor. (For life's bleachable moments)
2. Chloe, where is the ($30!!) bottle of lavender oil? Mommy, I was tired of looking at it so I dumped it out.
3. Mommy, here eat your dinner with Declan's spoon so I can eat my dinner with your fork.
4. And finally . . . a swift, hard kick to the nose to check mommy's reflexes (which apparently are operating on delay…ask Declan why).

But soon my babies will be college applicants, career seekers and looking for their first apartment. Give me a kick in the nose instead, thanks.